* With the 5th pick of the 2010 NFL draft, the Kansas City Chiefs select: a college player, or possibly trade down for more picks and/or a player/players.
* With the 36th pick of the 2010 NFL draft, the Kansas City Chiefs select: a college player, or possibly trade down for more picks and/or a player/players.
* With the 50th pick of the 2010 NFL draft, the Kansas City Chiefs select: a college player, or possibly trade down for more picks and/or a player/players.
* With the 68th pick of the 2010 NFL draft, the Kansas City Chiefs select: a college player, or possibly trade down for more picks and/or a player/players.
* With the 102nd pick of the 2010 NFL draft, the Kansas City Chiefs select: a college player, or possibly trade down for more picks and/or a player/players.
* With the 136th pick of the 2010 NFL draft, the Kansas City Chiefs select: a college player, or possibly trade down for more picks and/or a player/players.
* With the 142nd pick of the 2010 NFL draft, the Kansas City Chiefs select: a college player, or possibly trade down for more picks and/or a player/players.
* With the 144th pick of the 2010 NFL draft, the Kansas City Chiefs select: a college player, or possibly trade down for more picks and/or a player/players.

I’m not a draftnik. I can, however, accurately identify the team’s needs based on last year’s performance, along with already completed free agency transactions. Most writers work through the depth chart from top to bottom when writing articles such as this. Starting with the quarterback and ending with the long snapper, however, is anticlimactic. Thus, here are your 2009 Kansas City Chiefs, from the bottom up.

SPECIAL TEAMS
LONG SNAPPER: Esso si que es. Thomas Gafford is slow and occasionally gets blown off the line. Darche was a better player than Gafford, and Gammon was a better player than Darche. There’s considerable regression at the position, which begs the question: how much effort should the Chiefs put in replacing Gafford? The answer: not a lot. Guys like Gammon and Darche – snappers who earn more than their keep by contributing elsewhere in practice – are uncommon. Thus, my opinion on the subject remains the same as it has always been: it’s not worthwhile to waste a roster space on a dedicated player. Train a lineman or a tight end instead.

2009 Grade: D.
Need for Upgrade: Minimal.

PUNTER: Eric Dickerson is the only running back in NFL history to carry the ball 400 times one season and not suck every year after. We know the threshold for that position. What’s the threshold for punters? For two years now Dustin Colquitt has looked ragged toward the end of each season. Replacing him outright would be foolish, but if he consistently sees the same amount of action he saw this year, I’ll bet his shelf life suffers tremendously.

2009 Grade: B.
Need for Upgrade: Nonexistent.

KICKER:Do a Google image search for Matt Leinart, and the third result will be the infamous picture of him in a hot tub with four girls. Do a Google image search for Ryan Succop, and the second result will be a similar picture, sans hot tub. Nobody ever bitched at Ryan for putting himself in the company of beautiful women. With Leinart, it was evidence that he didn’t take his career seriously. Fundamentally there’s no difference between the two. Leinart, however, is a household name, and Succop is Mr. Irrelevant. Chances are nobody outside of South Carolina or the I-35 corridor ever even saw the photo of Succop. Succop also surpassed all expectations, while Leinart has floundered in relative mediocrity (though in Leinart’s defense, it’s important to keep in mind that he was unseated by a potential future Hall of Famer with a Super Bowl ring). For those that spent the last decade pining for a new tandem of the same ilk as Aguiar and Stoyanovich, Merry Christmas – Colquitt and Succop are better.

2009 Grade: A.
Need for Upgrade: Nonexistent.

RETURNER: For those that spent the last decade pining for a new returner of the same ilk as Dante Hall in his prime, here’s your lump of coal. There are no long term solutions. There are no short term solutions. Last year’s new wedge rules diminished the effectiveness of a good return man, thus making it less of a necessity, particularly given the dearth of talent at so many other positions. Still, the most memorable punt returns from the last three years were Turk McBride’s. That’s not zesty.

2009 Grade: D.
Need for Upgrade: Moderate.

DEFENSE
SAFETY: Discussions were entertained last season as to whether the starters should be Jon McGraw and Mike Brown, Jon McGraw and Dajuan Morgan, or Dajuan Morgan and Mike Brown. Bernard Pollard, meanwhile, was the catalyst for a sea change in Houston, and the Chiefs got nothing in return. Imagine, then, what Romeo Crennel could have done with him. Then picture the very real possibility of Dajuan Morgan starting in his old spot.

2009 Grade: D.
Need for Upgrade: Critical.

CORNERBACK: One down, one to go. Flowers is a superstar in the making, much the way Dwayne Bowe should have been, but with all the discipline Bowe is lacking. Carr and Leggett show flashes, but both are wildly inconsistent. Ideally Pioli would bolster both positions, but if it came down to replacing Morgan or one of the lesser corners, I’d take my chances with Mo and Brandon Lite.

2009 Grade: C.
Need for Upgrade: Moderate.

INSIDE LINEBACKER: Corey Mays and Demorrio Williams were starters. No more need be said.

2009 Grade: F.
Need for Upgrade: Critical.

OUTSIDE LINEBACKER: Tamba Hali dropped 15 pounds, moved out of a three-point stance, and transformed into a different player. He doesn’t need a Jared Allen type setting up plays for him anymore, but, by the same token, he can’t be relied upon as the team’s sole pass rushing threat. Mike Vrabel isn’t going to fill that void. Andy Studebaker might, but that shouldn’t stop management from addressing it as an immediate need. Ask the 2007 Giants if three pass rushers is too many.

2009 Grade: C.
Need for Upgrade: Critical.

DEFENSIVE TACKLE: Ron Edwards did in 2009 what he does every year – he dared the Chiefs to find somebody better. They couldn’t. He kept his job. He did okay. Say whatever you like about his ability, but respect his availability. He played nearly every snap after the bye week. At age 30. And he did okay. After three years of rallying against keeping him, I’m officially reversing my position. For as long as he can continue to be effective, the Chiefs should keep him around in some capacity.

2009 Grade: C.
Need for Upgrade: Moderate.

DEFENSIVE END: In time, Tyson Jackson may go down as one of the worst early round defensive lineman picks made by the Kansas City Chiefs. That’s stunning, given the company he’d be keeping. More than any other rookie lineman I’ve seen in my many years of watching football, Jackson looked utterly lost. Not until after the bye week did he have a game wherein he registered more than two tackles. Left defensive ends can get two tackles a game just by falling forward at the snap. Glenn Dorsey struggled mightily his rookie year as well, but he at least showed flashes of competence. Jackson did not. Thus, I have little faith that he’ll improve. The financial commitment to him is significant, however, so he’ll be around, for better or for worse. Dorsey, by contrast, became the dominant force in the run defense that fans anticipated he would become in the pass defense. He’s less Warren Sapp and more Richard Seymour. I’m good with that.

2009 Grade: This is the only position that I find difficult to assign a grade, simply because there’s such a discrepancy between the two starters. One is a B, the other is an F. I guess that’s a solid C-minus, even though neither was a C-minus player.
Need for Upgrade: Critical.

OFFENSE
OFFENSIVE LINE: What’s the overall career threshold for a run blocking guard? If your name is Mike Goff, the apparent answer is 12 seasons. Goff sucked, Albert sucked, Niswanger sucked, Ndukwe sucked, and Wade Smith was still Wade Smith. I’ve heard the assertion that Ryan O’Callaghan is a solid backup. I call shenanigans. That assertion is based on nothing more than the fact that he played for last decade’s dynasty. While on that dynasty’s roster, however, he couldn’t unseat Nick Kaczur. Kaczur is Jordan Black minus the potential. The problem was immediately addressed pre-draft. Pioli righted two wrongs by bringing Casey Wiegmann and Ryan Lilja back where they belong, but Wiegmann and Brian Waters are long in the tooth, and the team hasn’t had a consistent right tackle since steriod era John Welbourn. In the Vermeil glory days, even the backups were starter caliber. Right now, even given the erstwhile improvements, there aren’t enough starters to start, let alone warm the bench.

2009 Grade: F.
Need for Upgrade: Critical.

TIGHT END: With the Sean Ryan experiment mercifully concluded, the team can take a closer look at Brad Cottam and Leonard Pope. Niether Todd Haley nor Charlie Weis demand much from a tight end, so why bother spending a whole lot of time looking?

2009 Grade: C.
Need for Upgrade: Minimal.

FULLBACK: Haley and Weis value fullbacks about as much as they do tight ends. Furthermore, the team already has two decent ones. Unless the Jets want to trade Tony Richardson for next year’s 5th round pick, if it ain’t broke…

2009 Grade: A.
Need for Upgrade: Minimal.

WIDE RECEIVER: Perennial underachiever Chris Chambers was 2009′s shining star. Perennial underachiever Mark Bradley was 2008′s shining star. Underachiever-in-training Dwayne Bowe was 2007′s shining star. If the goal is to redefine the word dull, the plan is a raging success. If the goal is to catch balls and win games, maybe it’s time to start looking. Also, it’s time to stop looking for a poor man’s Wes Welker. Spend some money and find a real Wes Welker.

2009 Grade: D.
Need for Upgrade: Critical.

TAILBACK: Jamaal Charles has arrived. More importantly, Larry Johnson has departed. Thomas Jones and Jackie Battle are singing backup. Javarris Williams may yet have potential. But, again, Larry Johnson is gone, and that’s what matters most.

2009 Grade: A, on account of the fact that Larry Johnson is gone.
Need for Upgrade: Moderate.

QUARTERBACK: Matt Cassel was a college backup for a reason. He’s a young Damon Huard minus the vision. Actually he might only be a young Brock Huard. The quicker he’s out the door, the better.

Need for Upgrade: Mandatory. The Chiefs absolutely must look at a QB tomorrow and every day thereafter for the remainder of Cassel’s tenure. Even carting out the Riedel Bama Boy for another shot would be better than sticking with Matt Leinart’s clipboard jockey. It’s the top spot, and the Chiefs are scouring the bottom rung. Green, Gannon, DeBerg, and Montana were great signal callers, but none of them were here long enough to leave an indelible mark on the face of the franchise the way Len Dawson did. The Chiefs are overdue for a true leader, and there is no time better than the present for the front office to stand and deliver.

So who should they be looking at?

I don’t know. I’m not a draftnik.